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PART FIVE
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Speeches
for
Analysis
and Discussion
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306 INTRODUCTORY SPEECHES FOR ANALYSIS AND DISCUSSION
Tap, Tap, Tap
Needs Improvement Version
1 Hi, everybody. These are my tap shoes. They’ve been very important in my life.
There’s no place I’d rather be than on the dance floor.
2 I started tap dancing when I was a little kid. My mom made me go, and I was
scared—too scared to even dance. But my mom kept making me go because she thought it
would be good for me. I guess she was right, because I grew to love it.
3 I tap danced all the way through high school. I did shows and recitals—even a tour
with the school dance club. Along the way, I learned that I had to work hard if I wanted to
be successful. Today, I still dance when I get the chance.
4 I also danced when I was in middle school—and I got better all the time. There’s this
one move called the pull back, and it’s really hard. I still remember how hard it was. I prac-
ticed it over and over again. I thought I’d never get it right. But then I started to get better at
it, until one day all the pieces came together. Sometimes I would pretend I was tapping with
Fred Astaire.
5 Public speaking is a lot like tap dancing. If not for tap dancing, it would have been
really hard for me to give this speech.
6 In conclusion, tap dancing has helped me become who I am today. Thank you.
TAP, TAP, TAP: NEEDS IMPROVEMENT VERSION 307
Tap, Tap, Tap
Needs Improvement Version
Commentary
When shown in conjunction with the final version, the needs improvement version of “Tap, Tap, Tap” can
help students understand the difference between an ordinary speech and a superior one. Both versions
are available online and on the DVD of student speeches that accompanies this edition of The Art of
Public Speaking. Start by showing the needs improvement version and discussing what the speaker
could have done better. Then show the final version, printed on pages 309–310 of this manual, and dis-
cuss what the speaker did to improve. A synopsis of the needs improvement version follows.
Introduction: The introduction consists of paragraph 1. The speaker’s opening line (“Hi, everybody”) is
a bit casual, but it establishes a nice rapport with the audience and suggests that the speaker
has a certain comfort level with her listeners. The rest of the first paragraph avers the speaker’s
love of tap dancing and the importance of her dance shoes, which she is holding in her hand.
Unfortunately, she does not build on her opening as well as she might have. Rather, she plunks
her dance shoes on the lectern with a loud thud and leaves them there for the rest of the
speech.
In contrast, the final version of the speech opens creatively. Rather than just showing her
dance shoes to the audience, the speaker combines her words with brief tap-dance moves that
gain the interest of the audience and establish the speaker’s ability as a tap dancer. She follows
this with a concise preview statement of the main points to be developed in the body.
Body: Paragraphs 2–5 constitute the body of the speech. The main points in the body revolve around
the speaker’s growth as a tap dancer. While the main points cover essentially the same ground
as those in the final version of the speech, they are not developed as fully or coherently as in
the final version. In the needs improvement version, the first three main points fall into chrono-
logical order. The first (paragraph 2) discusses the speaker’s initial exposure to tap dancing. The
second (paragraph 3) states that she danced all the way through high school. The third (para-
graph 4) deals with how she improved as a dancer over the years. However, the fourth main
point (paragraph 5) does not follow the chronological structure of points 1–3. Instead, it states in
passing that public speaking is “a lot like tap dancing.” This is an interesting point—one that is
explored quite nicely in the final version. Here, however, it is an outlier that does not fit with the
chronological structure of the rest of the speech. All in all, there is a random quality to the body
of the needs improvement version that is not present in the final version.
In the final version, the main points are arranged topically—each focuses on a life lesson
that the speaker has learned from tap dancing. The first deals with the importance of hard work,
the second with patience, and the third with courage. Each point is stated clearly and developed
with crisp, interesting supporting materials. Most memorable is main point three (paragraph 4), in
308 INTRODUCTORY SPEECHES FOR ANALYSIS AND DISCUSSION
which the speaker demonstrates the pull back move that she mentions briefly in the needs im-
provement version. But even without this demonstration, the final version would be far superior
to the needs improvement version.
Conclusion: Paragraph 6 concludes the needs improvement version. The speaker cursorily reinforces
the central idea and signals that the speech is coming to an end. She accomplishes the minimum